F.O.S.L.A.

F.O.S.L.A.

Frustrated One sided Lovers Association

...tips and tricks..to stay alive and happy !!!

ok a long standing subject which i came across in a movie.."DIL DOSTI ETC."
but a subject worth discussing.. as it comes to my mind a person, a perfect specimen i had been knowing for ages...would act as the ideal inspiration for this...i would cal him Mr. A

Principles / Guidelines of FOSLA

Yah right!! the first and foremost motive of this association is to rectify the myth that one sided affections are not to be looked down upon ,and as of now not to be linked to a psychotic or paranormal behavior.

One sided affections shouldn’t be at the tip of social outcasts.

The person has all rights to live in a make believe world, how so ever unreal and has the right to love and shower undying affection be it one sided.

He / She have all rights to love one ,or more than one (yah it happens in short spans of intervals) and to express, or not express themselves at any given point.

Being moody is inevitable, and every one should be made aware of the fact that the mood swings are there because of the other side not giving proper attention.

Oath:

All the FOSLA members have to swear solemnly that they would dare not believe for once that their dreams are false and their affection though one-sided are of no major importance, they have to be happy and living life even if the one whom they love or have a crush on ,doesn’t bother to look, or ignore at any cost, or at worst humiliate publicly, they have to be strong.. And keep trying!!

Warning:

At any given circumstances FOSLA takes no responsibility, that it might be followed as a cult and advises that all followers of this belief – they should never harm any individual or themselves, drive them selves beyond the point of no return, they can any ways move on better pastures, believing those did not deserve their true love and attention, rather than being stalkers criminal minds or mass murderers, out of shear frustration.

How to get rid of jilted lovers, the Exs??

I was suggesting lots of ideas to my buddy who’s ex a guy has been troubling her , so i thought why not as a post on this blog.. Inspiration for some lesson for others….



So here it goes...

1. When ever you pass by him make him feel that your the happiest and u don’t need him and making sure he made notice of the fact repeatedly.

2. And hang out more within his circle - whom are your friends also mostly now.. choke him as much as u can.. bottom line..

3. Send him a cake with love u and miss u on top and add lots of Jamal Gota (Indian herb for constipated horses)..He would never be out of home leave alone trouble you.

4. Call up his mom/dad/sis/bro/grandparents and say.. he’s been troubling u, at two in the night!!! Repeatedly !!!

5. Send after him a pesky friend who’s desperate for any guy, and tell her he has a real hidden crush for her!!!

6. Better is tell all of your gay friends you broke off because he has secret gay feelings and needs to come out.. help him…!!

7. You put up his number online for the best deal on sex enhancement drugs, he would be busy fixing deals let alone bother you.

8. Fix up real encouraging caller tunes.. and take time to pick his phone up…

9. Sign him up for the distressed suicide help lines and tell them he needs counseling on regular basis.

10. Throw boiled eggs at him, and the fact the eggs don’t explode would make him feel shamed, that even he doesn’t deserve to be insulted properly.

CAUTION!!!
So any case, how it may turn out to be, I don’t take any responsibility or guaranty that these may or may not work.. and give special warning to those.. who are in the pursuit of troubling their exes without any reason.. Guys.. Get a life.. Now!!!

The thing called " THE BOSS"

Well a very interesting subject I have always wanted to write about is the thing we would have,or are, or would defiantly be experiencing in our lives, the thing called the BOSS !!

This reference to a “thing” to the most perfectly alive “person” ,, who has a uniquely clad .. Universal role, and has a special mention .. why ??.. Because of its capability of going beyond all rules of engagement (fare and unfair) after your life, and no matter what the profession you have .. you would always have experienced IT…until off course you are one.. but still as they say there’s always some one above you too!!

Any ways we go further in describing the - Thing, well to make it simpler.. I would like to put it in points. as I have mentioned before we have been going through so much crap all ready, given to us by our esteemed bosses, that we have a tendency to comprehend less.. and mostly in simpler language (or it could be by choice too as we tend to go immune to the occasional insults and pep talks by them).

So.. Here it goes :

1. How so ever may you slog and work.. its always less for them.
2. The more you work the more work you get!
3. The less you work more insults, and any case more work you get!
4. All praises are momentary till some important work is stuck, its normal by all means once its over.. and your no more important!!
5. They know that you are lying about it, they are there because they did it too!
6. Don’t sound too desperate with a reason for a leave. You won’t get it that easy.
7. Your asking for leave is directly propositional to your importance in a project which needs urgent attention.
8 boss’s timings are inversely proportional to yours while coming to office.
9. Boss never takes an off, so stop dreaming.
10. Bosses don’t fall ILL that easy, even if they do, they call their spy to confirm if there's party in his absence or not.
11. Boss knows every thing, his spies are amongst you and others are spying on those spies too. So no ones safe!!
12. At the time of the interview the bosses sound like advertisements to the perfect holiday resort, but the case is reverse once you get employed, you wish hell was better.
13. They take away thrice from what they pay you and they get paid better to do that!!
14. They are really incompetent and do not know anything at all.. live with it!!
15. No point reporting to the superior bosses, the boss has that bit covered.
16. You cant be the office “boss’s favorite good for nothing employee” of the month over night!! those who are.. have worked hard on ass licking over the years.
17. Even if you become one, do you think you can last long in the competition?
18. Bosses know every thing, live with this one too!!
19. Your work load and frustration level is directly proportional to the boss’s mood.
20. No even if you are aware of your mistakes and you want to avoid the situation, the boss has all the rights to point at them when you least want it to be.
21. Public humiliation and fault finding are bosses birth rights.
22. Fighting with the boss causes termination on the grounds of incompetence.
23. You work boss takes the credit, that’s how it works.. ok?
24. Boss messes up you take the fall for it, that’s why your called the “Junior“ !!!

Self Analytical Motivation

what is self analytical motivation all about??? its about all individuals in pursuit of pushing the self beyond the realms of the impossible...here no daydream is small...self appreciation is all what it takes...its all about saying good things... the very best things about your self..let the flights of fantasies take off. Wings of fortunes take u to an unprecedented high....and give courage and inspirations to those stuck at crucial points of their life and help create a new false world...
a world that revolves around u...with you as its axis. you as the source, at your analytical best..

few pointers on how you can achieve ...the same..

1. never think your less than anyone.. your are the best no matter what..
2.even if you don't sing never hesitate to use your voice...be expressive no matter what...
3. be the first one to laugh at your own jokes,people need all the inspiration in the world...
4.always live in the dreamy world where the most impractical remain practical..and your the king/queen.. of your kingdom.
5. never hesitate to be noticed even at the risk of being thrown stuff upon...you might use the stuff later..
6. show off as much as possible...you have been made present in this materialistic world for a reason better..act on it too..
7. let others think your the best of everything !! with the qualities of the most eligible person alive...basically lie like hell!!!
8. going forward to my last point... lie so well that even you start believing those things are real for you and hence you are what your never were..and it works for you better !!!
9. create your own blog and push forward your views and delete comments those say against..or do not agree...
10. Even if you get caught in a fix, just simply deny saying anything in the first place only !! or just say you were brain dead that day or under influence of a certain spirit that forced you to say it…
11. always present complete confidence in the most foolish of the situations you land up in..you were being any ways ignored at least you would be center of attention and still of no big help to any one ,any case!!!
12. self esteem becomes very important ..u have to constantly keep generating..as living a false and assumptive life with no major goals but just to imagine the best of the self ..you need all the esteem you can gather.

The Google In Me

Imagine if all had an inbuilt search engine,, some how connected to the WWW and all of over life times, unending, inevitable searches got a perfect end in the ultimate searching tool.. And that too within your self!!! Isn’t that fun just to think of ??
Well I would call my search engine.. or the tool as The Google in me!!!

So how happy or miserable it might make my life lets see…

We have a very nice habit of searching the first thing that comes to our mind on Google, so as if it were.. Hey where’s my mom??….and just going by the top ten results…you might end up with a Ethiopian or a Bangladeshi mom.. or one sponsored by American express in the sponsored results!!

Hmmm..possible…

So going ahead lets say..i get the urge to go to the loo while writing this blog.. again..top ten results…might just send me to the latest happenings in the NASA and their perfect technological break though in making the perfect LOO in the outer space!!! Or the sponsored results might just tell me to download the newest and the easiest way to relieve through their top of the line products.. ouch!!!!

Breaking News

In Spite of being allergic to blogging concept for half my life, i seem to have finally landed up on this 800X600 blogger page to begin with my first post. And this itself is a breaking news for me.

So as of now let me adapt to the evolution of myself and please do come back to see what i finally do with this blog!!!

I'll be back...